Saturday, February 28, 2009

Self Confidence is a luxury.


Quite the week.

Frustration at work, missing my family, elated at seeing them again, sober, not-so-sober, hangover, exhausted, and finally, Friday Night Finish Line. kind of.

Took the kids to Chucky Satan last night at the begging of my wife, and reaffirmed why I believe that mouse to be the Anti-Christ. He scares the crap outta my daughter anyway, so why are we going there? Oh that's right...because that's where I left my migraine. Was wondering where that thing had run off to.

Then, off to find the elusive Burrito Zacatecas at my fav refried bean dispensary only to find that the economy had eaten my restaurant. I cried in the car for 15 minutes until my wife begged me to pull it together in front of the kids, and we moved on to another establishment, rated an extremely distant second in my book. sigh.

So this morning, after waking up with a belly full of substandard tortillas and vodka, it is time to corral the hooligans, and hunker down for a Daddy survival day in the house due to 30 degree weather outside. Makes sense, right? I mean it was 80 degrees yesterday, so clearly it was 30's turn.

Well, there is one more thing I want to share with you before I launch into my day of rotating Kix, Fig Newtons, hot dogs and chicken nuggets.

I am coming out of blogger hiding with 30 other locals tonight to have dinner together in the Dallas area.

JillJill, EM, Sloane, Elaine, Shauna...bloggers I love to stalk will tonight be able to look me in my eyes, and judge me. The thing is, well, people don't tend to like me in person quickly. Im not the guy that people are drawn to...definitely not "Fun Bobby". I'm the guy that you get to know, learn how my sarcasm works, and find one day that I have worn you down. (usually it's the same day you find yourself in bed with me, right honey? ;-) SLAP)

It's something about me that I've always had to overcome, and it makes excelling at work a challenge at times. Essentially what I am saying is that sharing my personality in the real world may be a blog-killer.

So this morning, as much as I have been looking forward to tonight, I find myself quite apprehensive. Maybe I'll just sit in the bushes outside the restaurant, shivering and peering in the window rather than putting myself out there. Maybe after being beaten up by my kids all day I will find myself with no remaining strength, ego, or sense of humor, and decide not to go.

And maybe I just have so much admiration for these people that I won't be able to stay away. Maybe I'll try to remember that I'm not 14 anymore, and that some people give you a chance no matter how uncomfortable you appear to be.

So maybe I WILL go.

...and keep my frickin' mouth shut.

I'll be the creepy guy in the corner. That's better, right?

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26 comments:

Saundra@ItalianMamaGoneCrazy said...

Oh My... that one had my on the floor.

YOU are gonna be fine. So are they.

Their first impression of you will be your blog... that's a GOOD thing. First impressions go a long way.

AND there are 30 other people that will be feeling and acting the same way... so you only have a 1 in 30 chance of messing it up!

Good odds right? You have to go.

Lee of MWOB said...

Oh creepy Jay, I would LOVE to be there tonight and pull you out of the bushes!! And I would die to meet those bloggers you mentioned!! Lucky you!! Why is EVERYONE in the Dallas area?? What gives??

You'll be fine, have fun, and I can't wait to read all about it!!!

:-)

Lee

Kristen Zirkle said...

If you beg, maybe I will go with you. Send me a message.

Candace Jean July 16 said...

Hilarious. But you had them at "Halftime Lessons." You all put your pants/panties on one leg at a time. Suck it up and show up. Wish I could be a fly on the wall. Or in your soup.

Mary Moore said...

You're funny. And you sound a lot like my husband. Everyone hates him until they get to know him, and then they're not sure what to think...Have fun!!

Jenn@mylifewiththecrazies said...

Jay... Go and have a great time! You are gonna be a hit... they are gonna love u! PS... I am still laughing my ass off with this post!

jill jill bo bill said...

Your harem awaits your arrival. You better show your ass up. And I am moving the name cards so I can kick you under the table all night when you start being a buffoon.
I cannot wait!! See you tonight!!!

Candice said...

It's a shame I have to work tonight. I may have shown up drunk with you.

Have fun!

Mrs4444 said...

That sounds like fun. I wish I could find some bloggers around here... off to google~

Deb said...

you dont NEED to talk.... jill will be there (duh).

you better not back out. i need someone to give me the lowdown.

Alicia said...

You will be fine...and will have a wonderful time!

Under the Influence said...

Damn, I'm moving to Dallas! Apparently that's where all the fun is.

Lolli said...

Have a great time. I'm sure it will be great.

blueviolet said...

I think it's going to go over just fine. Everyone will be nervous and likely thinking some variation of what you're thinking. I think you're about to walk away with 30 new friends!

Jen said...

that is so cool to meet up with other blogger. I hope that you totally go!!!!
I want to hear all about it too. So I hope that you kiss and tell.
And now, I am going to say that I am really jealous. I want to meet some cool blogger too. There are just no neat bloggers by me. You all seem to be in Texas or California. What is up with that.

Frogs in my formula said...

You cried in your car? Maybe a Xanax would help...I'm sure you have some lying around? Or Lexapro, Xanax, Zoloft, Effexor, Wellbutrin, Prozac, Paxil, Celexa, Remeron or Zyban?

Jenners said...

Well, I for one am interested to see how this turns out. It shocks me that you feel this way because you seem to ... you know .. confident and all on your blog.

I suffer the same paralyzing fear though that if I had the chance to meet other bloggers for real they would think "L.O.S.E.R." I write much better than I talk, and when I am nervous, I just blurt out random stupid stuff (just ask my husband...he has been witness to my inane social babblings multiple times .. it cracks him up). Plus my physical appearance can best be described as unfashionable bordering on ridiculous. So good luck to you! I bet it will be fun and everyone else is just as scared as you.

love the "Fun Bobby" reference.

Jenni Jiggety said...

I am so sad that I don't live in Texas...I would sit in the corner and we could feel self conscious and unworthy together!

Have FUN!

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Jay, I wish I had the chance to talk to you. I thought maybe you wouldn't know who the hell I was... what am I saying... I'm sure you don't! but, I thought you would be mobbed with all your other blog friends, so I kinda kept my distance for fear of putting my foot in my mouth and embarassing myself! Maybe next time we have another DFW meetup I will just say "hi" and get over myself. ha ha. Hope you had a good time tonight. I sure did.

April said...

i bet you'll have fun :-) i would be nervous too though. especially if i were as weird as you. ;-)

Tony@ That One Paticular Harbor said...

I can't wait to hear of the nights adventures. Jill Jill I bet is a riot. I wish I could have been there. I need a fun interesting evening.

The Eadle Family said...

lol, hope you have fun at your dinner.

Sorry things don't seem to be going your way. Maybe the toilet paper roll is on right this time though ... that could be a sunny side up?

nicole said...

It was a pleasure to meet you. I for one enjoy sarcasm and dry wit. And I shared many of the same feelings before going, perhaps obvious by how quiet I was. Anyway, I'm glad you overcome some of your reservations and came.

mommaof4wife2r said...

creepy guys in the corner is def not better!

i love that you all are getting together...and i'm so very sad for your loss of your fab mexican restaurant. that's a terrible thing!

Eudea-Mamia said...

How I wish I had read this yesterday before dinner! We could have been neurotic together. Truth be told, I think besides Holly and Jill, the rest of us were probably in the same emotional boat.

Strange, how a situation like that can take you back to being the new kid in class. And when I say you, I mean me.

I hope you liked my earrings!

Beth said...

I wish I could be a fly on the wall. Well, not really a fly. Just able to magically hear the conversation.

And I can't imagine you being silent. That just isn't how my vision rolls.

posthumous pointer
To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one's self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - this is to have succeeded. - Emerson