Saturday, November 15, 2008

WAL-MART NEWSFLASH



First off, I have an unconfirmed report that Wal-Mart may have upped the price of Oak Leaf wine to $2.97. This is a stunning blow to those of us who have been drinking it after your 4yr old throws her 78th fit of the day and you finally get her to bed, and reach for a bottle.

I will be pushing past my liver pain and trekking to the local Wal-Mart with Wal-Mart Bingo Card in hand today (Thanks, Candice, you smelly pirate hooker) to verify this tragic development, and will report back.

And to those of you who tried this wine and threw it back in my face for it not being the second coming, I think you may have missed the frickin' point...

It's not a great wine. It's an average wine.

It's a GREAT wine...................for $2.88.

It's a MIRACULOUS wine..............for $2.88.

Now, for $2.97......................we'll see.





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19 comments:

Jenni Jiggety said...

Walmart hooked you on the wine and now they are raising the price? Falling prices my foot! The bastards...

sassy stephanie said...

Oh man. It went up? Hope I don't have to get a job now to afford a few bottles.

iheartbowheads.blogspot.com said...

ok - that makes me laugh - not to make light of your crisis but your post did make me laugh

:)

Los said...

Sadly, I live in Pennsylvania, and only the state ownded liquor stores are allowed to sell wine and liquor ... and of course, they overcharge for all their wine, forcing us to go to Delaware for tax free shopping.

Kristen Zirkle said...

Why don't you just get a bottle of Boones Farm already. I'll pay the extra $5 myself.

Whitney R said...

I saw the bingo card and want to play, too.

Jay @halftime lessons said...

Boone's Farm is for cheap bastards. I am an Alcoholic Financial Conservationist.

Look it up, smelly pirate hooker.


;-P

Tony said...

You slay me. Wal Mart? Really? The 9 cent increase is due to the falling fuel prices of course. LOL

Tash said...

ha ha ha that afternoon delight was funny Must order that movie on netflix. I must have missed that one.

Eudea-Mamia said...

Now the kids really won't have a nice Christmas. Thanks for nothing Walmart!

I plan on kicking the smiley face in the teeth next time I drop by.

Em

Kristina P. said...

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Ron Burgandy. Stay classy.

Oh, and I've been curious to get your take on my male coworker's serious mancrush on Christian Bale. Weird? Normal?

Temple said...

Awesome...
I'm having flashbacks to college...
What's the word? Thunderbird!
What's the price? A dolls' twice!

manic mariah said...

I'd drink any wine that is under $3.00

Candice said...

Hey, I may be a pirate hooker but I do not smell. Just ask One Eyed Willy!!

Madge said...

$2.97 per bottle... that sounds like a good baby shower gift. maybe a case of it, because those first time mothers do not know what is coming their way...

Jenn P. said...

At least you can buy wine at your Walmart. I live here in Utah where you can only buy wine at the liquor store!

david mcmahon said...

Wine? You have to try our Australian wines.

Or better still, try 'em in the Barossa Valley.....

Evolving Mommy Catherine said...

Anchorman ROCKS! I love it, nice touch Jay, nice touch!

Lacey in the Sky said...

What kind of bullshit is that? I say the cheaper the wine, the more you can drink without feeling bad about yourself!

posthumous pointer
To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one's self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - this is to have succeeded. - Emerson