Wednesday, September 17, 2008

I am seriously underqualified for these conversations.


After reading Snow White again for the Nth time one recent evening, my wife and I were suddenly hustled out into oncoming traffic by my 4 year old daughter with a topic I thought I still had years to prepare for. As Snow White lived happily ever after with her prince, my daughter noticed the last picture in the book...Snow White as a bride with her Prince husband.

"Why is she married?"

"Because she found her true love, and when you do, you get married”, my wife threw out without hesitation. Clearly, she had been through some training on this as a child.

“Well, I want to get married.”

At this point, knowing full well I might scar the child for life if I interjected with my thoughts on reality and pagan rituals, I left the girls to explore the world of make-believe, and went downstairs. Shortly thereafter, Kat came down and walked into the office with a concerned look on her face.

“We may have a problem.”

“Super, honey, we haven’t had one of those in a long time. What’s up.”

“She wants to marry you.”

Now, I could have happily gone without any conversation like this one for at least the next 30-35 years, yet here it was already, and my wife appeared to be the conductor of the Pre-K Misguided Crush Express.

“Well, what did you say?”

“I told her that she isn’t going to marry Daddy, she is going to find someone else that she loves, and marry them.”

To which Lil Miss C allegedly got a look on her face that was described to me as a cross between “Shock and Awe” and utter dismay.

I sat thru this story with this sinking pit in my stomach, realizing I have yet to buy my shotgun AND start digging my basement. As far as men and their emotional baggage full of joy and pain are concerned, this little girl only knows a love for her daddy at this moment. And at the tender age of four, she is about to abandon that blissful ignorance, never to return.

Assuming she can get past the armed lunatic at the top of the basement stairs.

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11 comments:

Eudae-mamia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Eudae-mamia said...

As a mom to two boys, I solemnly swear to you, and all parents to little girls around the world, that I am trying, desperately at times, to raise two little gentlemen who will respect and cherish your daughters.

If all else fails, please aim for their knees.

Em
(I deleted my original post - sorry, I HATE - my - typos!)

Kristen Zirkle said...

You are so in trouble with that one-you and Brent and go gun shopping together.

Deb Williams said...

i don't see the problem here... if my 11 y.o. marries outside our immediate family, my husband and i will just have one MORE person sleeping in our bed with us every night. i think i would rather have him marry me. freud would disapprove, of course, but my side of the bed would be secure. alternatively, i suppose he could marry one of the dogs (they ARE female, so no raised eyebrows, people!).

this post is very sweet, jay. enjoy the love, any way you can get it! she'll be out the door before you know it. and she is such a doll...

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

Awww...that is so sweet...I know heartbreaking for you. The love a daughter has for her father...and a son for his mother...if only it would last.

Thanks for stopping by my blog the other day...Sorry it took so long to get back to ya! Hope to see you again, I'll be back.

Amy @ Milk Breath and Margaritas said...

heh. Suit up dude. My oldest is a 19 year old girl and I honestly believe 13 to ? (I'm hoping 20? 21?) is hell on wheels.

My son wanted to marry me until he was nearly 5. I just said how sweet that was and didn't correct him, cause it was really sweet.

Now, he thinks girls are super yucky, but he still excepts me and his sister. Which is sweet too!

Oregon Elkhorns said...

Jay,
That was a beauty. I hear you brother as I have an 8yr old who is going on 20 in her mind. I have told here she can go on her first date upon completing her doctorate and Jurisprudence. It is just this fear that keeps me in the gym, my supply of wife beater tee-shirts neatly pressed and my stock of shot gun sheels and my sharpie close to write the name of said male on prior to possibly allowing her to date ever. and I mean ever.

susan said...

It's interesting to me to note that our two teens *still* love their daddy the best!

I also have to laugh at him when he tells them that when they DO get married they have to move in with us. I don't think so...I've got my eye on that extra room! lol

Luanne said...

How precious is that little girl of yours?!? What a sweet story...and yet I see where the disturbance comes in...it'll be ok!!

Michelle said...

Awww, how sweet. And actually, Little Miss has it one worse... her daddy is a teacher at the middle school that she'll attend. BWAH HAH HAH!

Although I don't think Mister Man wants to marry me already, and he's only four. *sigh* He did promise to dance with me at his wedding though.

Perdita said...

You write very well.

posthumous pointer
To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one's self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - this is to have succeeded. - Emerson