Thursday, April 2, 2009

Maegan, MamaKat, and Miserable Dirtbags.


First off, I have to commend the lovely Maegan for being such a good sport yesterday, she loved the video. I knew there was something I liked about that gal, and if I offended her, she sure didnt let on! Go check her out soon, she has an insane (awesome) sense of style, and she and her husband are living the LA life while the rest of us watch it on TV...well, not me, but everyone else. I swear. Really.

Next, MamaKat's Workshop had a writing prompt that I wanted to answer today:

Prompt: Are you always right?

Answer: Yes. See below.



Other than that, I only have a short message for a guy I almost met this morning.

The guy in the pickup.

Who had previously eaten his Chick-Fila, gathered up his trash, and placed it in the refuse-disposal device...the back of his truck.

You see, my friend, you think it's funny. Or, you believe that there is some benevolent mystical force that along with removing toenail-perforated socks from your dryer, also removes and disposes of your trash from the bed of your truck in an appropriate container for you.

But in fact, when you are hurrying to Walmart to get the latest box set of "Dirty Jobs" and an eighteener of Olympia, that trash catches the gust of wind (that I can only assume was intended to carry the last 20 points of your IQ off into the breeze) and ends up on the street where our kids play.

You, my friend, as well as the lady I saw roll down he window recently to dispose of TWO full fast food bags and TWO half full Big Gulps at the stoplight she was bored at, can share the same feces-filled room in hell.

Throw your damn trash in a trash can. It was all I could do not to chase you down, follow you home, and spend a beautiful afternoon kanoodling with your neighbors to inform them what an ass you are.

If the problem is simply that you dont have enough room in the cab for that last bag of trash, it might be time for a minivan. Whatever the cause of your deficiencies, it's time to wake up and become a valid citizen. Look it up.

And while you're at it, mow your lawn. Never mind how I know.


(Yo MamaKat...See how right I am...AGAIN??!!)

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34 comments:

Kelly said...

if you're quick enough to catch their plate number, you can report them for littering. can we say $200 fine? ouch!

Kelly said...

ps. woot! i'm first!

The Daily Blonde said...

If you need help, I'll come out and help kick some litterbug ass.

Ugh, I sound so tough. Alright, I'll send them a scathing letter. Better yet, give me their names, I'll blog about 'em, too.

Warthogs.

Sarah said...

Shame you didn't stalk him home. You could have taken your garbage can over there in the middle of the night and decorated his lawn. Add a sign that says "Sorry I thought this was the back of your truck."

Jenn@mylifewiththecrazies said...

Oh see now, this totally bothers me... I HATE when people litter near my house. I am not 'as green' as I should be BUT C'mon people!!! Trash in its place!! Thanks Jay!
Oh... and I think I saw you parked out front of his house hehehehe

LeAnna said...

HA! AWESOME! I m so with you on this, and with Kelly on calling them in to the PO-lice!!

Jenny said...

I hate it when people throw stuff in the truck bed or out the window, how lazy. I always love when plastic grocery bags come flying at you while going down the highway from the moron's truck in front of you,errr, drives me crazy.

Bee and Rose said...

Litterbugs suckety suck! I always think of that poor Indian with the tear streaming down his cheek...

Saundra@ItalianMamaGoneCrazy said...

Oy Vay! From your mouth to God's ears!

I hate litterers!

Kristina P. said...

Another earth destroyer! Yay! ;)

Shawn said...

Whew, I'm thanking my lucky stars that you weren't on a rampage about those of us that leave dirty dishes in the sink overnight!

I can dodge the litterbug bullet, the dirty dish one...not so much.

Young Momma said...

That was good. I hate liter bugs!

kel said...

I didn't get a chance to comment yesterday.. I love the video!!! You look hot as a blonde.

Sera said...

Great post. I think learning the word "kanoodling" was one of my favorite parts.

Tony@ That One Paticular Harbor said...

Amen Brother... I have a few more creeps to add to your list, but maybe later. Great Post!

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

Woo Hoo....you tell 'em Jay!

Clare said...

so funny!! and so true, how does all of that nasty trash end up on the roads...i have always wondered!!

Liz (Loving Mom 2 Boys) said...

so funny, so sad, so true...I just don't get it...is it really so hard to throw your crap away?! Idiots...

Crafty Christina said...

Oooh, litterbugs drive me nuts. Especially here in Brooklyn, where there are trash cans on nearly every corner of every street.

I can't empathize with your lawn issue. There aren't any lawns in my neighborhood. Even backyards are made of concrete.

Momma@Live. Laugh. Pull your hair out said...

I would have lost it if I saw someone throw their garbage out their window!

Soxy Deb said...

Oh dude. I WOULD have followed him, but I have issues.

We have a 1-800 number in our town were you can call and report someone for littering. I bet that sucker rings off the hook.

jill jill bo bill said...

Are you on your period? I hate litter bugs as well, but since the hys, I am much calmer. Just a suggestion.

NateAndJakesMom said...

Litterers beware! Scared me and I don't even litter!

MamabearMills said...

OH< i know he has room inside the cab for that shit! I use my passenger side foot area for my garbage, and you wouldnt believe how much I can store there!!!! Whenever I actually do have a passenger to sit in the frontseat, they get all nervous that they are smashing something valuable. Nope, just my yearly backup of trash. Occasionally I open the door while Im driving to clean up a little. WHat else am I going to do!?!?? JOKING, GOSH!

Lee said...

That shit pisses me off SO BAD.
I've seen people do it.
I always feel guilty when I toss my gum out of the window. I can't IMAGINE full bags of fast food.
What are you, stupid?

mommaof4wife2r said...

ridiculous...dirt bag is right.

Mama Kat said...

People actually do that?? Were they Russian??

Anyways, yes Jay you're always right. However look how famous YOU are!! Spotlighted on Blogher like that! I'm just glad they highlighted your blog on a day you linked to ME. That makes me secondary famous...and I'm ok with that.

...love Maegan said...

no, I was seriously laughing the entire time ...Hilarious about Blogher as well ...so great.


....and really? People throwing trash out the window? that is so not right on so many levels.

You're right!

Angela said...

You know, normally I would be quick to dislike someone so sure of himself. But I can't argue so far, you are most certainly right.

::golf clap::

The Eadle Family said...

I hate that. The world is a friggin trashcan to these people. I can't even let a piece of gum wrapper fall to the ground. UGH! Not only that, but that gust of wind could easily blow the trash into someones window, and cause an accident. Irresponsible people.

TentCamper said...

My man....You tell em. I got your back. I hate when people just throw their shit ...where ever.

Cecily R said...

My daughter would SO call those littering dweebs out...and when she's mad, BACK UP. 'Course, that doesn't stop her from doing the SAME THING in my living room. Sigh.

blueviolet said...

I've never seen people pitch trash like that. Maybe a wrapper or something but not a big old bag of fast food refuse.

Eudae-Mamia said...

I'm so with you my friend.

I actually took my life in my hands one day, when I was still young and naive, got out of my car at a light and let some jackass have it after watching him drop his glass orange juice bottle out the window onto the median.

Yeah. I'm lucky I didn't get shot. But damn it felt good.

See, Republicans love the environment too :-)

P.S. I love me some "Dirty Jobs" and Mike Rowe. Watch your mouth.

posthumous pointer
To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one's self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - this is to have succeeded. - Emerson