Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

Sunday, September 28, 2008

My most intimate fantasies are deep fried.


Nannette at GirlFriday (I love her blog!!) submitted the following question: "What is your biggest, most secreted guilty pleasure?" Thanks to Nannette for playing Stump the Moron...If you have a question you would like to ask Jay, submit it here.

In the interest of keeping this an NC-17 blog, my deepest desires and guiltiest pleasures have always been food related...essentially, if you were a woman who was interested in me at all, you simply had to do little more than take one of your shoes, batter it, drop it in the deep frier, and ask, "Are you man enough?"

And I was.

I am a fiend for deep fried anything...I would like to be buried with a bucket of KFC in a dumpster in the back of KFC, with pall bearers gainfully employed by, you guessed it, the local KFC.

And if I somehow avoid hell, I have to believe that the only other option available to me is the Texas State Fair, or as my medical wife likes to call it, "Triage". This year, they have a bevy of delicacies awaiting me including "Deep Fried Coke", "Chicken Fried Bacon", and another that defies comprehension, "Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Waffle Balls".

I am here to tell you, if I one day can stomach the smell of burnt hair, I will be seen hobbling into the Texas-OU game with my once in a lifetime indulgence, "Jay's Chicken Fried Strawberry Marinated Thigh 'O Plenty"...with chocolate dipping sauce.

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To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one's self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - this is to have succeeded. - Emerson